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Career Counselling Session at Lotus Valley International School, Gurgaon

A career counselling session was conducted by Usha Albuquerque‚ a nationally respected television personality‚ at Lotus Valley International School Gurgaon. Parents and Learners of Grade VIII‚ IX and X attended the session. The session was conducted keeping in mind the present scenario where the adolescents face problems like Peer Pressure‚ Family‚ Society‚ Respectability further adding to their dilemma and anxiety.

The main focus of the session was the process of career planning which involves self awareness‚ career information‚ connecting to the information and then planning the study route. It was a comprehensive session which persuaded the students to believe in themselves and make informed decisions while success has follow.

Mrs. Anita Malhotra ‚ Principal Lotus Valley International School Gurgaon said‚ "The children should be focussed and have self awareness . There are many vibrant career options available, what is most important is that whatever one becomes professionally, it is most important to be a better human being."

The session formed flexible parental perspectives giving away rigid and unrealistic expectations from their children and help them choose a path keeping in mind their interests and abilities.

First Session by Dr Shayama Chona on the Grand Opening of Lotus Valley International School, Gurgaon

Dr Shayama Chona started her session on - "Your Children-Our Assets" on a very light yet healthy and motivational way. Since the session was so captivating the Parents were holding tight to their seats and enjoying every bit of it. She said that every child is unique and need lots of love and respect. The child looks upon their Parent and follows them. If Parents expect total honesty from their children, they need to make sure that they are totally honest with them. Give children all the privilege, all the freedom to enjoy their childhood. Let them do on their own because "Doing is learning". She further said that today both the Parents being working are not able to spend quantity time with their children but they should try and spend the quality time. She spoke about the three different Parenting Styles –Authoritative, Authoritarian and Permissive and the best PaSrenting means balance of all the three. It was indeed an enlightening session. After her inspiring session, Parents had queries which Dr Chona and Mrs Malhotra answered in a very convincing manner that they went all satisfied and happy.

The Session ended with a vote of thanks to all Honoured Guests and the founder Parents for their benign presence.

Second Capsule of "Parenting" By Dr. Shayama Chona

The Parents of the Learners of the Lotus Valley International School Gurgaon saw yet another day when Dr Shayama Chona, our Patron passed the beautiful message on "Parenting". Dr Shayama Chona visited the school on Saturday, the 30th April 2011 to give the second dose of Parenting Session to the Parents. Parents of Grade V to Grade VIII were invited for the same.

Mrs Anita Malhotra (the Principal) of LVIS, Gurgaon refreshed the Parents of the last session on Parenting conducted by Dr Chona on the Orientation Day (2nd April, 2011).

Dr Chona started by saying that a baby in making has seen both the darkness and light and when he/she is born it is up to the parents as what they want to introduce to their child, whether the beauty of the light or the ugliness of the darkness. Whether they want their child to see the glittering, dancing and sparkling eyes of the parents or those of worrying and tiresome, the choice is of the Parents. She added on saying that no matter how tired the Parents are, but always let the child feel the pulse of energy.

Dr Chona went on saying that if we give the best of love and care to the child in his formative years; he will return back to the world in manifolds. Parents need to recognise the need of the child. How we hold the little one to what we feed and how we feed makes a lot of difference. She said the parents need to watch on their own behaviour because someone is watching. Parents are his/her icon, heroes and heroines, they are everything and so they need to be really careful in what they are doing.

Dr Chona refreshed the audience on the three types of "Parenting Styles" that she talked about in her first session. She briefly spoke about it that one is Over-Possessive, second is Indifferent and third is Over-Powering. Over-Possessive is when the parent feels that they know the best for their child and do not like any kind of interference from whomsoever. Indifferent is one where parents are not bothered much about what and how the child needs to do things and leave everything on him/her because they believe in letting the child grow naturally. Third is the Over Powering when Parents are over disciplined and expects the same from their child and they can't tolerate any kind of indiscipline. Dr Chona asked the parents to close their eyes and actually think about what kind of parenting style they follow and if they are Indifferent one day and over possessive the next day that creates all the more problems.

Parents are concerned about the future of their children; what is it that they are going to be in future. What kind of work is required on the futuristic mind to make it more effective and efficient and she calls it the "Futuristic Mind". Dr Chona's question to the audience was "What is it that we together have to do to create a futuristic mind?" she said that everybody (Parents, teachers, counsellors) all need to work on the greatest child psychology. She carried on saying that some work needs to be done on five minds of a child; within the mind there are five areas one needs to work upon. First and the most important is Disciplined Mind: She said by Discipline she does not mean "Yes Sir", "Arrive on Time" or "Just follow the rules". Discipline is knowing the child's talent, potential and capability and work on it. She said that at a very early age one is able to determine whether the child is going to be a doctor (looking at his/her concern for others), love for numbers can very clearly depict that he/she will grow up to become a Mathematician and so on and so forth. It is the duty of the Parents to build up step by step and bring out the "Hunar" that is there in every child. This is called recognition. Today there is an opportunity to bring out the talent.

Second is the Synchronised Mind. The question arises as to how to synchronise knowledge. There is so much knowledge around flowing from different sources (TV, Internet,Books,other sources of media). But one thing to bear in mind is every information is not knowledge and all knowledge is not required. Use the knowledge that is required and throw away that is useless. The question arises how a mind can take and discard. Everybody is saying that "I am the best" so how do we judge who is actually "the best". Child's mind at 18 will be filled so he has to learn how to utilise it. So it is the Parents who need to work on the subject.

Third is the Creative Mind. A creative mind is one which can produce I-Pad, software. He/she can be a person who can give to the world something new. That's the creativity, which will change the world and improve the life of humanity.

Then we come to Respectful Mind-The mind that respects diversity, mind that has respect for others. The mind that can sit with rich and poor, ugly and beautiful is required.

Ethical Mind - which is unadulterated, non-corrupted, learn to stand alone and be able to follow the path obediently. The child knows the difference between the right and wrong. It is the duty of the Parents to bring back the "Gandhi" in every child so that they leave in peace for the rest of their lives. The children value Environment-have respect for the five elements of nature-Fire,Water,Air,Earth and Sky.

The session ended with questions of Parents to Dr Chona on certain behaviour of their child which she answered so convincingly that the Parents went highly satisfied and are looking forward to many more such meaningful and highly motivated sessions.

Third Capsule on Parenting Session by Dr Shayama Chona on 30th July 2011

Parenting Session by Dr Shayama Chona was conducted on 30th July 2011 at 10:30 a.m. for the Parents of Grade Pre-Nursery, Nursery, Prep, I and II. This is the third parenting session since the school has started.

She started the session by making the parents realise that nothing is more important than the child. Children come first. To make children comfortable, parents need to plan out and for planning, they need time.

She recited a beautiful poem which goes like this:

"Whose child is this?" I asked one day
Seeing a little one out to play
"Mine," said the parent with a tender smile
Mine to keep a little while
To bathe his hands and comb his hair
To tell him what he is to wear
To prepare him that he may always be good
And each day do the things he should."
"Whose child is this?" I asked again
As the door opened and someone came in
"Mine," said the teacher with the same tender smile
He'll tell you."
"Mine, to keep just for a little while
To teach him how to be gentle and kind
To train and direct his dear little mind
To help him live by every rule
And get the best he can from Sunday School."
"Whose child is this?" I asked once more
Just as the little one entered the door.
"Ours," said the parent and the teacher as they smiled
And each took the hand of the little child
"Ours to love and train together
Ours this blessed task forever."

She added on saying that it's neither the teacher nor the parent who can groom the child all alone. It is when both the parent and teacher join hands, it works best for the child. The passion to prepare your child for the future is only possible when school and home come together.

She said when the child is at peace, the parent is at peace and when the parent is at peace, the whole world is at peace. she further said that we have learnt two lessons, the first kids are important and second school and home coming together. Third thing she spoke about was the Parenting skill. There is no such thing as "best parenting skill". Like every child is unique, every child is different; the parenting skills ought to be different and unique for each child. By the age of 7, parents have already made the foundation either good or bad.

This world consists of people with both negative and positive attitude. We are trying to create an attitude that is positive. And for that matter everybody who comes in contact with the child; parent or teacher has to do the same. She further said that the children of the parents present at the session must be of 4,5 or 6 years old and the problems are 4,5 or 6. The younger they are the fewer the problems. As they grow older, the problems grow.

Dr Chona introduced the new concept to the parents;'PHP', "Parents helping Parents", which means very simple things like baby- sitting for other parents, sharing transport, sharing issues, problems, learning. It helps in creating lot of love and affection among the children.

Dr Chona spoke about the importance and the true significance of "Deepawali". Deepawali is a sanskrit word, where Deep means lamps and awali means row of lamps. Deeya which is so concrete represents five elements: earth, space, water, air and fire. The flame in the Deeya represents our consciousness.

The session ended with a beautiful message to parents that we need to light the candle in every single heart. We have the power in our hands as parents and teachers to candle the diya (child) and see it grow.

Parenting Session by Dr Shayama Chona on Parent's Orientation Day on Saturday, 31st March 2012

2nd Parent's Orientation was held on Saturday, 31st March 2012. Dr Shayama Chona, Patron, LVIS Gurgaon conducted the Parenting Session for the new parents.

Dr Chona started the session congratulating the school Principal, Mrs Anita Malhotra, on the tremendous growth saying that she has yet to witness a school which has grown to 650 learners from 150 learners in a year.

She started addressing the gathering by saying that parents are the role model for their children and they look upon their parents as their source of inspiration. Parents need to be very careful on what they say and do because the children believe and follow the same. She said that there are two things: motion and emotion..Motion is when we are on move at a fast pace, when the parents don't have time for their children..what parents need to do is bring emotion into motion by making your child feel special , by slowing down the pace rather than enforcing kids to hurry up. Parents should deal the children with smile, don't saddle the child with emotions. Dr Chona said children remember the arguments more than the love between the parents. She asked the parents to always put their best foot forward. Parents should not impose their views on children rather let the children do and say whatever they want.

Dr Chona further stressed that it is not important if we do different things but what matters is we do things differently and that is what makes the difference. She said parents are responsible for their children and so when they grow up, they should not question as to why are they like that. Because ethics and values cannot be seeped till the child sees it around him/her. BE AN EXAMPLE, BE THE HEROES AND THE HEROINES and not the VILLLAIN.

Children are our Gurus and we can learn a lot from them. Physical, emotional and intellectual development is very important for any child.

Dr Chona ended the session by briefing the audience on the SURVIVAL KIT which is very - very important for the parents to possess. In a survival kit, they will have- cotton ball - for times when the parents cant's hear themselves think, rope- in case they get to the end, rubber band - to remind them to stretch and grow with their children, sweet and sour candy - to remind that every child can be both, eraser - so that they can start each day with a clean slate, Clock - to remind them that time passes by so quickly, enjoy every moment, Puzzle Piece- to remind parents are an important piece in the journey of their child's life, Marbles- to replace the ones they have lost, Band - Aid - to fix hurt feelings, Nuts - to remind them to laugh, Candle - so that they never feel in the dark when they are with their child, Do Not Disturb Sign-to remind the parents that they need time for themselves, Aspirin- so that when everything else fails – they even can take two , Peppermint - to remind the parents that their job as parents is worth a mint and finally Velcro- for times when they need to get a grip on everything.